dmsj

And a killer sinus infection. No wonder I've been so miserable!

I'm sure I've done this before, but ...

Bold the ones you've read COMPLETELY, italicize the ones you've read part of. Watching the movie or the cartoon doesn't count. Abridged versions don't count either. BTW, according to the BBC if you've read 7 of these, you are above the average.

( Clicky )

I should build my "To Read" list from this - there are a number of books on here that I haven't read but would like to. While 7 is "average," I'm kind of ashamed that I'm only at 16. Note, btw, that all the italicized (save for The Bible) books are ones I was assigned to read in school but only ever skimmed. Some of these, I would like to try again now that I could truly appreciate them.

Buggie: *tugging on my arm as I sit on the couch putting on my shoes* Mommy, go away.

O: *chuckling* Hey, that's not very nice.

Buggie: Please!

Our little boy is quite a talker. I've mentioned before that he knows the names of a bunch of different dinosaurs, all his numbers and letters (and he's starting to get them in order now, too - especially if we sign them for him), and lots of shapes and colors. He amazes me.

But sometimes, he just cracks me up, and I wanted to share some of his funny or unique phrases and pronunciations.


* "Sorry, Liam foot!" when he stubs his toe on something, or just "Sorry, Liam!" when he in some other way bumps himself on something.

* "2,4,5 - Ready or Not - SURPRISE!" (sometimes it also includes "Habby Dirthday!")

* His frequent lunch-on-the-go of cheese, pickles, and olives has become known as "oh my," because of a silly joke I made one day recently when he was having it.

* "Hung'y Herbivores!" (his favorite song from Dinosaur Train) ... which now comes complete with little munching sounds when he plays with his new dino playset

* "beach booms" (aka waves in the ocean)

* "bibbit bibbit" (frog noise)

* "G'een agglepas, gyue agglepas." (green pacifier, blue pacifer)

* "Mommy/Daddy/Grandma/ball/other toy or object, c'mere!" (funniest when it's said to an animal or inanimate object)

* "gyeb" = bread

* "yum"/"yee-um" = Liam


I think I'm going to start posting these periodically and make a collection of them, as there are so many things we just don't want to forget!

I'm not sure the "one year in Florida" plan is actually going to come to fruition. We've both changed our focus a little since coming back from NY and me starting this temp. job and such. It started with a resume-request from one of O's friends, for a position in Palo Alto, CA. This is the same company he was considering during the summer, but we ruled it out because of location. Now, however, we're starting to wonder if we need to change location because let's face it - things have not been all that promising for us here in Florida. We'd both been hoping this possible position was in the company's DC-area office, but it turned out to also be in CA.

However, the company does have a similar (though not identical) position in their DC office. This realization got some wheels turning for both of us, and we're both feeling like maybe that area is the way to go. If anywhere is going to have a decent job market at all, it's going to be that area first. And we have friends there. And the seasons, while much milder than NY, still change there. And it's closer to NY. And there are long-term opportunities there in fields we both desperately want to get into.

And it's not on the west coast, which is looking to be our other major option. If we have to do that, we will. But neither of us want to, particularly. (The thought of it still makes me want to cry; I'm just afraid of closing any doors right now.)


I am posting this as a desperate plea for prayers/positive thoughts/etc. Please keep us in your thoughts in the coming weeks as we try to put this new plan in motion. Please pray that this works out for us in the way we are hoping. I am praying as hard as I can, myself.

Does anyone have a good remedy for antibiotic-induced diarrhea in a toddler? Filling him up with yogurt a couple times a day for the probiotics is not doing the trick. Not even close, in fact.

It's not my anniversary quite yet, but I was inspired.

I adapted this recipe to suit my needs.

Applesauce, unsweetened, 1 cup
Granulated Sugar, 1 1/5 cup
Flour, all-purpose, 3 cup
Ginger, ground, .5 tsp
Cinnamon, ground, 3 tsp
Allspice, 1.5 tsp
Baking Soda, 2 tsp
Pumpkin, canned, without salt, 15 oz can
Egg, fresh, 2 large
1/2 c. egg-substitute
3/4 bag of white choc. chips
some (what we had left) dried cranberries

This makes 2 loaves. I mixed everything in one bowl, in the order stated above, stirring between items (and between each cup of flour). Since I only have one loaf pan, I'm baking one loaf at a time at 350 for 45 minutes to start out with, then will adjust as needed. (Will edit this post if the timing needs drastic adjustment). If you have two pans, you can bake for one hour at 350.

You really can't go wrong with a day that is made up of library, gym, reading, mini-golf, and Panera. :)

Been very active today. While O was getting ready for a meeting he had this morning (and after he left), I mopped the floors all the way through the house. I also cleaned the master bathroom, stripped the master bed and our bed and threw those sheets in the wash, and straightened (including the lanai). I also did my usual gym routine after O got home and L was napping, AND we all took a walk to/from the park before dinner.

L also gave me no struggle with naptime, which was a nice change.

And I'm now enjoying some relaxy-time, and about to put the computer aside to read more Eragon.

I got a birthday card from my mommy today, with a check enclosed. I haven't totally decided whether I want to just use it as guilt-free spending money, or if I want to save it towards an eventual dSLR camera purchase. I/we spent a small amount today on a $5 skirt for me, two pair of Bug-jammies, and dinner at Moe's. Mmm, Moe's.

There are possibilities all around right now. The most promising is some freelancing work that O has lined up, which could turn into a long-term situation and/or even a partnership. Keep your fingers crossed on that!

I am also hopefully going to be taking on the job of volunteer editor for the church newsletter. I'll be meeting with the administrator on Sunday (unless she e-mails back and wants to get together outside of church some other time) to discuss it. Sure, it's volunteer, but it's experience and it looks good on the resume, and it'll be fun!

I also applied for a job I desperately want, last night. So please keep me in your thoughts in that regard as well!

This may or may not be the light at the end of the tunnel, but there is definitely plenty of hope and excitement in the air around here. :)

( Today's positive: ice cream on the beach at sunset )

There is so much happy involved here, I think I'll let the pictures (and the others from yesterday and tonight) speak for themselves. :)

Forgot yesterday's Daily Positivity (#6)!

That said, I suppose a lot of this covers it. Yesterday I was very thankful that L seemed to be feeling a lot better than the day before. I was also thankful for the extra snuggles that tend to come along with having a sick little boy.

(FYI, he's back on regular food as of today, and other than some congestion and occasional crankiness, you'd never know it'd ever happened.)

Will be back later with #7 - I prefer to do them at the end of the day, so I can take the opportunity to look back at the day as a whole.

Today's Daily Positivity came at me suddenly, from down the hall. I was reading on the couch while O gave L his bath. When he was out of the bath and in the bedroom, I could hear giggles, and silly voices (both of them) saying, "Dry dry dry!" as is one of their little Daddy-Son rituals. I knew O was rubbing L down with his towel and entertaining him in the process. Their fun and obvious love of one another made me break out in a huge smile.

I'm very blessed. :)

While in the store earlier, L was in the cart and kept leaning forward to give me hugs. Buggie hugs are one of the best parts of any day. :)

(bonus points to anyone who wants to send me a mix CD of this type of music)


I am looking for energetic instrumentals to listen to while I am both working out and reading. I have a great Energy playlist for my non-reading workouts (ie, elliptical training), but on days when I'm reading while using the stationary bike, I prefer things without lyrics to distract me. I'm thinking Blue Man Group, Combustible Edison, etc.

I already have the Audio album by Blue Man Group, several tracks by Combustible Edison (Breakfast at Denny's, Carnival of Souls, Call of the Space Siren, In the Garden of Earthly Delights, Laura's Aura, and Short Double Latte), and one song by Mushroom (The Evolution of Smells in an Underground Parking Garage... )

Any other ideas? And places I can get them cheaply (but ideally, legally)?

I need a new TV show to watch - ideally via DVDs from the library. My criteria are as follows:

1. I'm looking for "fluff," but GOOD fluff.

2. Characters must really catch my attention and have some depth. If I don't find myself "missing" them after a few days have passed, it's not a good show. Most of what I like (both in TV and books) is very character-driven.

3. Needs to be at least a few seasons old, as I'm hoping to get them from the library, as I said above.


Previous interests that would fit these criteria include Buffy/Angel, Gilmore Girls, Sports Night... and even 90120 back when I was a teenager.

I deleted my other post because, well... this one is going to be a clarification of what led to that. The big thing here is this: I keep finding jobs that require qualifications I don't have. And when I find those, I think, "I wish I had X, Y, or Z." But ... getting X, Y, or Z takes too long to be practical, in a lot of cases. I'd been researching the HIM/HIT programs in the area, thinking it would at /most/ take me a year to complete, hopefully less. And that would open up new doors to me that my current qualifications do not. Unfortunately, it seems like that is likely to take at least a year and a half to two years. Plus I wouldn't qualify for in-state tuition rates until I was almost done with the program, if I started this term (which is, of course, looking less and less likely). So while it's not totally ruled out, it's going on the back-burner (with so many other options and half-options) because I can't justify the time and money expenditure for something I'm not truly passionate about.

The MBA is still a possibility, though I'm not sure if I'll be able to do it full-time. It may be a matter of "wait and see," which is hard right now because so much is up in the air. My big hesitation with the MBA is financial as well. It's even /more/ of a time and money commitment, so I'm hesitant to do it unless I'm REALLY sure it's what I want.

Part of me wonders if I'm just trying to find any excuse to go back to school. And if it's about /that/, rather than really, truly furthering my career ... then no, it doesn't make any sense.

It's also somewhat about control. I can't control the job market. I can't control how long it takes for O or myself to find gainful employment. Returning to school is something I /can/ do for myself, rather than being dependent upon so many outside factors. But again, that's not a good, solid reason, either. I know the MBA makes sense in a lot of ways, but it's very overwhelming, and I'm not sure whether or not I'm ready/willing to take it on at this juncture.

And part of me is afraid of getting stuck. I don't necessarily want to keep being "just" a SAHM anymore. If O finds work before I do, then I'm afraid of feeling trapped. Afraid of stagnating. Please don't read that as, "I don't want to spend time with my son." I do. I love him. But I need a change (ironic, considering the past two months).


... I think I'm having a mid-30s crisis. Where's my shiny new sports car? :P

Things are stressful, no doubt. I'm on the verge of making huge life decisions (along with O, of course), and some of them are scary and make me sad.

But tonight, I got to forget about all of that and just play outside with my boys.


Life is good, even when it's hard.

Things I/we did:

* packed up Buggie's closet, the remaining books in the attic (well, O did that), more kitchen stuff, some desk stuff
* sold one of O's guitars and took away more stuff for Goodwill
* attended a 4th of July gathering, wherein I was reminded how much I don't like being around people who are drinking and not minding their children (but did manage to enjoy some of the company there, anyway)
* took Buggie to a playgroup
* started to feel like myself again, proving (again) that yes, Life Is Better when I'm on Lexapro
* ate more sweets than I should have
* baked bread
* took a meal to a couple of new mommies I know, and saw their teeny-tiny little girl
* dishes, laundry, assorted miscellanea & mundania
* cuddled with my husband
* played with my little boy


Things I/we did not do:

* smack the living daylights out of the child who tried to kick my son, or yell at the people who were drinking and setting off firecrackers
* get out to the house to take measurements (not for lack of trying, mind you)
* do as much packing as I'd have liked
* go home to Ithaca, as I'd really love to be able to do one of these weekends soon

Reasons why my husband is awesome (right now):

* He made a kick-ass zucchini, bacon & cheddar casserole for dinner. SO SO good.

* Most of the book-packing in the attic was his doing, and he's also getting rid of a BUNCH of his books, something I've wanted him to do for ages but he resisted.

* He's doing PJs and bedtime-prep all by himself (along with having spent some post-dinner, pre-PJs playtime with Liam) because he knows I need some downtime.

* When we talk about something that isn't working the way it used to in our relationship, he makes serious effort to fix it.

* And most importantly, he's awesome because he's Mine! :)



(And now I'm /really/ headed offline to read.)

O got the test results back today, and they were negative. In fact, they were actually negative for any type of flu. Apparently, however, there's been a different virus going around, which presents with all the same symptoms as the flu. Guessing we had that. In any case, though, he's now cleared (and feeling better enough) to return to work tomorrow morning.

---

We decided to make today an Offline Day, a tradition in the KolyStar household from years ago, but which has fallen by the wayside. I think I'd like to make it a more regular occurrence, though - possibly even sometimes when O is at work, to help with my addiction. That's gotten pretty out of hand again lately, for numerous reasons, and I'd like to get it under control again.

---

Due to the feeling better and the being offline, we managed to actually Get Stuff Done today. We packed a couple of boxes - Buggie's stuffies, and our unnecessary shoes. We donated some things to an area daycare - outgrown disposable diapers, and some toddler food that contains soy - and picked up the diaper liners we'd purchased from Heather. And we made bread (which didn't turn out quite right, but is terribly tasty - just didn't rise enough, probably due to not having the correct yeast on hand). Oh, and we made up another batch of all-purpose cleaner/disinfectant and cleaned away the germs.

---

No one told me that Fuzzi Bunz run HUGE. Liam is a size L in all the diapers we own, and should be L in Fuzzi Bunz too, based on their weight chart. But we just got the 2 we'd ordered, and they're too big on him. So I guess we'll need to track down some M's at some point soon, if we're going to start trying those for night-time diapering. (He has another diaper rash, too, and I think it's from using disposables for bedtime. His skin is super-sensitive.)

---

Paperwork mess is all done, re: house, which means our closing date should, in fact, be 7/31. This likely means we'll be doing the actual move (with truck and all) on August 8th, pending an e-mail back from friends whose son's bday party may be that weekend too. LOCALS: Anyone who is willing and able to help us move that day, please let Oliver or me know ASAP. Thanks!

One side of my brain says:

It was a long, tiring week last week. L & O have both had colds, and I've had a few symptoms. I stayed up too late last night reading and playing games on my phone (because O slept on the couch since he was stuffy-nosed, and I hadn't had any time for that this week). I'm tired and I want to just spend the day vegging and snuggling/playing with my cute little boy.



The other side says:

I'm moving in about a month and a half. My house is a disaster because of last week's chaos. I did almost nothing all day yesterday because I was tired /then/, and was spending time cuddling with O. The dining room needs vacuuming, the kitchen and bathroom need cleaning, the stairs and hallway need to be Swiffered. I haven't walked since Friday, either.



Bah, stupid guilt. :P

I managed to drive myself to and from rehearsal last night (though 2 of my section-mates yelled at me for it; I wouldn't have done it if I didn't feel totally confident that I'd be okay), and I didn't have any trouble standing throughout the rehearsal either. I did sit down once or twice, but it was more preventative than necessity.

This morning I'm feeling a LOT more lucid than I have in several days. I've only had one wave of dizziness at all, and it was milder than I've had in the past. My theory is that this is allergy/sinus-related, and now that I'm back on the Flonase (the last time this happened - though it wasn't as severe - they put me on Flonase to help clear things up), things are improving.

I may, however, keep my appointment for tomorrow anyway. I can still talk to her about the weight issues I'm having.

... and I just had another wave of the dizzies, so it's probably best to talk to her anyway.


I /do/ feel better enough that I'd consider going out for a walk if there weren't a 70-80% chance of rain today. (Which could also explain the improvement in my condition, if I weren't one of those unfortunate types for whom rain makes allergies /worse/.)

In any case, there is a mountain of laundry (which will have to go in the dryer, since I can't hang it outside, bah!) and a sweet Buggie which both need my attention. Bye, all!